STUDY ON:
A Dad’s relationship with his daughter (protecting her beauty).

FIRST THOUGHTS:

I cannot emphasize how much I love my daughters.

Oh, how precious are my daughters!

How you treat your daughters reveals your heart to them. What you allow them to wear, allow them to see, and where you allow them to go … lets them know how much you love them. Our daughters will be attracted to men with their father’s characteristics. Is that good or bad? How do you treat their mother? How do you show your love to your daughter? Read again carefully. YOU are who your daughters are looking for in life.

Of course the warm weather has brought to light this neglect (as it does each year). It is a huge area of neglect regarding how fathers need to protect and to train their daughters in God’s laws for modesty. It breaks my heart to see young ladies dressed in outfits that reveal their very flesh of private areas. For it is the PARENTS who have taught them how to dress like this … simply by allowing it and approving of it (Even by approving of their friends who teach them how to dress). My daughters WANT my opinion because they trust me for their future and do not want to be deceived by a man simply desiring their beauty! We often talk about man’s lust and they do not want to marry a husband who only wants their flesh!

Fathers, OPEN YOUR EYES!!! Protect that which God has given to you. By allowing them to draw young men into sinful thoughts, the fathers of these overexposed daughters are sinning, as well. It is very sad that so many fathers seem to be neglecting this critical part of raising their daughters.

- How a young lady is allowed to dress may determine if she becomes a prey for young men or is treated with respect by men who are holy. How do you allow your daughter to dress when she leaves the house? Is she revealing her flesh or revealing her spirit? What kind of man do you desire her to be with?
- How a young lady is treated by her father may determine if she will try to seek love elsewhere in a man’s arms. AGAIN, if a daughter is not getting love by her father, she will find it elsewhere! Because she is not getting her self-esteem fulfilled by her father at home. Yes, you heard me right: our daughters NEED their Daddy’s attention to fill that void!

 We can give our daughters affection by: conversing with them as a close and dear friend, and listening to them and their needs.
 We should be giving our daughters compliments by: telling them how beautiful they look and how much they mean to us.
 Yes, listen up, and we MUST protect them out of our love for them by: explaining how they are to save their physical bodies and beauty for someone who loves them for who they are … their future husband. We can’t allow them to dress as the world dresses; TELL them it is because we love them. They must understand that this pleases both their father and our Lord (If they are being raised right … this SHOULD matter to them!).

How do you show your daughter that you love her? Do you allow your daughter to reveal her private areas that are to be kept private and saved for her husband? Do you simply give them a quick kiss as they go to their friend’s house … not caring who their friends even are? Does your daughter know that she is not to lead other men into sin? Have you taught your daughter the truth?

I am amazed by how a father can let his daughter’s chest, or any other private part, be seen by any man? Why would I want a man, that is not her husband, be lusting after my daughter? What wicked father would allow this? Do these same men let their wives go out like that? (If yes … they most likely will not understand this study and this concept of God’s righteousness!) Our daughters must know how to dress modestly and behave godly, so as not to attract an ungodly man, but a holy and righteous one. This is according to God’s Word … To us, what other way is there? If we allow our daughters to attract other men with their flesh, then that is the man they will marry and most likely divorce when their bodies are no longer satisfying.

VERSES THAT RELATE TO SEXUAL IMMORALITY
(Yes … inappropriate dressed woman is a hint of sexual immorality!):

- “Your beauty should NOT come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of GREAT WORTH in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands” (1 Peter 3:3-5)
 Why do so many young women dress like they are ready to go stand on a street corner? Why do their fathers allow them to go out revealing what God meant to be private and between husband and wife ONLY? I want a young man to see my daughter for who she is … NOT because of her physical appearance (Isn’t that the “icing on the cake” and not why the cake was bought?). The man who dates because of who a woman is under the clothing, will ALWAYS be looking at other woman the same way (while married to your daughter!). Do you want that for your daughter?

- (When a young lady goes out “dressed to kill”, she is not using her body in a way that is holy and honorable.) “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should AVOID sexual immorality; that each of you should LEARN to control his own body in a way that is HOLY and HONORABLE, NOT in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God … For God did NOT call us to be IMPURE, but to live a holy life. Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit.” (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, 7-8)
 My family? My daughters know that if they bend over and people can see down their shirt … they must change (Here is the miracle … they WANT to please me and God!) They may even ask me, “Daddy, do you think this outfit reveals too much?” They know that I would not steer them wrong when it comes to living a godly life unto God. A life THEY now desire! They know that they are absolutely beautiful and they want a loyal, faithful, and God-fearing husband … like their Dad is to their Mother.

- (What is a hint of sexual immorality? Is it “painted on” clothing? Is it the exposed cleavage? Fathers … how much of your daughter do YOU want other men to see and lust after?) “But among you there must not be even a HINT of sexual immorality, or of ANY KIND of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be OBSCENITY, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be SURE: NO immoral, impure or greedy person – such a man is an idolater – has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God.” (Ephesians 5:3-5)
 Fathers, our daughters are precious to us. We should want to raise them and prepare them for a man that is equally concerned about their well-being and who loves them by showing them. So, in a way, we are to be showing them by example. With our lives: This is what you are to look for in a husband, my love.
 Our sons? Oh, that is another study. But be assured … my sons are being prepared to flee from the sexually immoral woman … is he fleeing from your daughter? What kind of man do you want for your daughter?

LAST THOUGHTS:

Don’t be fooled either. Our children can have a double life and often the parents will NEVER know. Make sure, fathers, that you win the heart of your daughter BEFORE another man does! I don’t buy my daughter’s love by showering them with gifts and I don’t barter for it, either. My daughter’s heart is MINE, and mine to lose from the start. It is MINE to give away to another man … her husband. Our daughters want and desire a father who protects and cares for them. They want hugs and affection. They want to be protected and guided. My daughters see how I treat THEIR mother … and they love it … they want that, too!

In closing and simply to remind ourselves. There are only two ways to raise our daughters:

- According to the “flesh” and the “world’s” standards and desires
- According to the Spirit and what God’s children are commanded to look like

Here are some other thoughts to ponder:

Although this passage is speaking about the body of our Messiah, it refers to the truth about our physical bodies, as well: “And the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. And the parts that are UNPRESENTABLE are treated with SPECIAL MODESTY.” (1 Corinthians 12:23)

Remember when Adam and Eve sinned and they realized their nakedness? What did they cover themselves with? (Fig leaves) What did their Father do? He clothed their nakedness with animal skins! Their attempt was not enough! Today many think that fig leaves are ample dress … God still commands “animal skins” (smile)!